Too Much
by teamfreewill82
Summary: Friends noticed these things about one another, sure, but they didn't agonize over them in detail as the last thought before sleep.


**Disclaimer: I do not own** _ **The Dark Artifices**_ **or anything pertaining to this series except my own writing. I published this story on Archive of Our Own as well (as I am IzzyLightwood there), so read this wherever you like. I used an art snippet released by CC and CJ; see if you find it. *smiley**

Sometime between Kit's arrival at the Institute and the seven months he had been living in it, Kit had realized something. He liked the sound of Ty's voice. He stared at Ty's Shadowhunter hands, the pipe cleaners wrapped around the slim fingers. Noticed too often the intent look that became stuck on Ty's face when he read, working to solve a Holmes mystery, or researched on Watson.

Friends noticed these things about one another, sure, but they didn't agonize over them in detail as the last thought before sleep.

Kit had known he was pansexual for a few years, and hadn't ever really thought anything of it. Johnny never said anything; Kit hardly acted on his thoughts anyway. Ty was his first experience in wishing, truly wishing, that he could. The first experience in which he truly _wanted_ to.

But Kit had agreed to be Ty's friend a little more than a month after coming to the Institute. Ty'd asked, Kit had said of course. But now he was seriously wishing that he had thought a bit more.

The only person Kit felt at all comfortable talking about his feelings with was, surprisingly, Drusilla. She held the same affinity for horror films as Kit did, and her self-conscious look towards her body put them on the same level of _What am I? Who am I? What do I do about it?_

They sat together in the den of the Institute; it served as a second living room, tastefully furnished with a couch, arm-chairs, and television. Kit's legs were stretched before him on the couch while Dru was curled up in a chair. Kit wriggled his toes in his socks; it always made Dru laugh.

"If I don't pass the Runes exam Diana is going to murder me," Kit said.

"There's a good chance," Drusilla agreed. "But I'm sure it'll be fine."

"Seriously?" Kit lifted his eyebrows. "Dru, I haven't grown up with this stuff."

"It's been seven months, Kit! If you don't have it down by now, with your Shadowhunter blood– _Herondale_ blood–you won't ever get it."

Kit rolled his eyes. All anyone ever seemed to remember about him was that he was–distantly–related to the Jace Herondale. Well Kit would make a name for himself one day, and Jace would be known as _his_ distant relative. "Thanks, Dru, really."

"Oh, come on," she laughed. "You won't fail. You've been practicing the flashcards with me… and Ty."

Kit dropped his head back onto the pillow behind it, emitting a loud groan. "Nooo."

"What?" Dru questioned innocently.

"Talking about your brother is going to make me sick, okay, just no."

"Why not? You need to talk about it."

"No, Drusilla, I do not," Kit denied. "In case you haven't noticed, I'm doing pretty well with Ty. Know why? Because I'm ignoring my brain."

"How so?"

"When it tells me to tackle Ty and kiss his face, I turn and leave," Kit said. "When it tells me to grab Ty's hand, I turn and leave. Getting a pattern here…?"

"Christopher." Kit groaned again at Dru's use of his full name. "Seriously. You still feel the same?"

Kit looked at her. "Of course I do, Dru. It's Ty. It's killing me. Being his friend is killing me. I don't know how to deal with this."

"You'll figure it out," Dru assured him.

"Really? Because right now, all I know is that it's too hard to be around him. It's too much." Before Kit could say another word, the door of the den was flung open. In the doorway stood Tiberius. Immediately, Kit jumped to his feet, face devoid of its usual color. "Ty!"

"What're you talking about?" Ty demanded, grey eyes stormy.

"How much did you hear?"

"Enough to know that you clearly don't like to be around me," Ty snapped.

Kit released a breath, already trying to make up an excuse. "No, Ty, that isn't–"

"I know that I'm different," Ty said. "That doesn't mean you can lie to me." From her chair, Dru watched the scene with wide eyes.

"When did I lie? I never–"

"Really?" Ty held a challenge in his voice, an upper hand, but all at once it was heavy with hurt. Kit felt sick. "Then why did you say you want to be my friend if you didn't mean it?" Kit's mouth opened, but he was at a loss for words. What could he possibly say that could fix this? He didn't have to try at all, because Ty didn't give him the chance. He was out of the room in a flash, Kit left staring at an empty doorway.

"I guess you're right," he said quietly. "I don't want to be your friend. I want to be your boyfriend."

Dru hurried to stand beside Kit, grabbing his arm. "It'll be okay, Kit; Ty just gets upset, you know how he is."

"Yeah. But he's right. I _am_ lying."

"You're doing what you think you have to. Things'll be okay tomorrow, I'm sure." Kit ducked his head, rubbing at the back of his neck with his free arm. Dru tugged on the other. "Come on," she said. "Cristina made cupcakes."

"Yay…"

"Just come _on_!"


End file.
